People might be surprised to learn I had my first real kiss when I was 18. People might even be more shocked to hear me describe it as ‘magical.’ Quite honestly, it was. Hi-Five!
It happened on the night of my senior prom, with a girl that still remains quite special in my life today. The night was perfect, so was the kiss. We were dangerously in love, and as such, completely scared to death of one another. It was dark, we were outside by the water, and it was slightly raining. The moon was out reflecting off water, tension was high and we were both nervous. I was holding her tight; we were facing each other and my coat was over her shoulders as it was a bit chilly out. She had her head buried in my shoulder for extra warmth / comfort. Our bodies dangerously close to each other, we slowly and cautiously moved our heads towards each other, let go of our fears and the kiss happened. Everything stopped, got blurry, and two people fell in love. (There are plenty of Steven Segal movies on Netflix Instant Queue if you need to man-up after reading that.)
Albeit I may have been somewhat of a ‘late bloomer,’ I learned very quickly what constitutes a good kiss, and I attribute 150% of that knowledge to how my first kiss went down. If I would have rushed into kissing like my friends did, I never would have understood the energy buildup and release that is required for an amazing kiss to happen. Instead, I would have been more focused on the physical, and it wouldn’t have helped me much in the long-run.
Kissing is only about 10% physical. Good kissing is an energy thing. Bad kissers focus on the physical. Good kissers focus on the energy/moment.
You see, the girl I shared my first kiss with was deep in my heart, and as such, when the kiss finally happened, it was an immense transfer of loving energy, rather than two people consensually pushing their lips together. We cherished each other so much, that when we physically connected lips, emotion and feelings lit us up like a Christmas tree.
When an opportunity to kiss someone arises, make sure you’re ready – mindset wise. Physically, you should want to make the hairs on their neck stand up, their knees go weak, spine tingle and you should want them to completely forget where they are. Mentally, you don’t have to be in Love, but you do have to have an energetic feeling like the other person is the most amazing creature on this earth, and that you’re blessed and grateful to be sharing such an intimate moment with them. You should feel nothing but gratitude and amazement for the other person and cherish the moment your lips touch. They should be the only thing that matters, and you should feel that you’d rather be there embracing them than be anywhere else in the world. I guarantee they’ll respond favorably.
Even better, approaching kissing this way completely negates any physical screw-up you might be compelled to do. You’re going to be so focused on cherishing the amazing person you’re kissing, that without even thinking you’ll move slower, be more tender, and more amazing. Bit of a warning though, this method can and will lead to more sexually physical interactions… but I’ll save that stuff for another article.
An amazing kiss will linger in the memory of the people who performed it, and you’d be very surprised what it can do for your relationships. It’s one of the only things Cher has ever said that I agree with – “It’s in His Kiss.” It’s hugely important for women, and something you should definitely work on.
So next time you get the chance to lip-lock with someone, keep this in mind and make it amazing. Or, best of all, if you already have someone with mouth real-estate you frequent, try this method out and see what happens. You’ll thank me in the morning…